Greetings from the mountain top…

The life of a guru is filled with questions, a search for answers, students, really hot students, introspection, reflection, good ganja when the students drop by, and really sore buttocks from sitting on a boulder day after day.

Today, however, The Guru takes you inside his own damn self.

The Guru is The Guru because he…

…understands that nothing is as beautiful as the laugh of a child.

…made friends with his inner child after spanking his ass for being a brat for so many years.

…thinks spelling matters (there is a spell check for Christ’s sake).

…believes organized religion is an opiate.

…appreciates a true lady. In public, anyway.

…admits that looks matter. But they aren’t the only thing that matters. The Guru has met many ugly people with beautiful faces.

…knows that intelligence matters, too.

…knows that so does a sense of humor.

…knows that so does the willingness to try new things in life…like different music, food, books, thoughts, ideas, positions.

…loves inappropriate humor (Family Guy, Tosh.0, Monty Python).

…loves good books (The Road, Illusions, Tin Roof Blowdown, Atlas Shrugged).

…loves challenging conversation (let’s debate illegal immigration, decline of the middle class, or the definition of ‘is’)

…feels sorry for Lindsay Lohan and would adopt her if he could .

…always reads between the lines (that’s where the good stuff is)

…knows he is full of shit.

…knows you are too.

…laughs at those who deny the last two statements.

…understands none of us are getting out of here alive, no matter how many Botox shots you may take or how much bottled water you drink.

…sees many of the strings holding us all at bay.

…has been known to tug on a few of those strings (especially if they’re holding up the breasts of a 20-something, wanna be hippie chick).

…thinks. Yes, think. It’s not a four-letter word, ya know.

…believes in taking care of the machine with good food and exercise.

…believes your body is an outward reflection of your self esteem.

…has fallen down, received scars, has wounds, and is not afraid of them anymore.

…has admitted and truly apologized for the wrongs he has done in life.

…has truly forgiven those who have hurt him.

…knows it is all just an illusion.

Peace out ya introspective freaks


Filed under Philosophy


  1. Rachel

    The Guru is clearly an intellient, well-read, thoughtful and obviously witty man. Even though this woman disagrees with his views at times about women, she enjoys his musings thoroughly.

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