Greetings from the mountain top…

The Guru two mountains over dropped by this morning with an interesting tidbit from the lands below. There is, apparently, a rule that sex shall happen on the third date.

First, The Guru knows not of dating as the last time he engaged in such activity volcanoes were still erupting and Michael Jackson was still black (and alive), but it is an interesting phenomena to put ‘rules’ in to romance. What anal-retentive, control freak thought of that? Must be an American thing. The Guru has traveled the four corners of the earth (the earth IS round, by the way…but the powers that be don’t want sea travelers frightened) and only in America are rules applied to romance.

In France, for instance, a romance may last an hour, a day, a lifetime, or until all five partners have orgasmed to the point of coma and no one really cares if it’s all over. Italians are much the same as are the Spanish.

Romance shouldn’t be restricted to the same protocols as a coloring book or a game of Yahtzee. It should be more like water flowing along a creek (preferably one where no one is pissing unless that’s your thing) where it goes where it goes, as fast as it goes, for as long as it goes (again, not discussing urination…yes, The Guru has had some late night prostate issues so his attention is a bit diverted). Romance should just be…

But three dates and then sex? Why not five? Why not three hours? Why not have sex immediately (as The Guru typically advises the 20-something, wanna be Boulder hippie chicks who visit the mountain top) and then determine if you want to talk after?

Rules…are for suckers. And anal retentive control freaks.

Take The Guru Dating Oath…

I promise
To enjoy the moment
For however long
The moment lasts
And that includes masturbation

Peace out fellow freaks

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Filed under Dating, Philosophy, Sexuality

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